


Michael in the Bathroom With Someone Else

by ElaborateSchemer



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Anxiety, Panic Attacks, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2019-02-08 09:11:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12861369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElaborateSchemer/pseuds/ElaborateSchemer
Summary: Someone finds Michael having a panic attack in the bathroom and helps him through it. This is my first work here, so any feedback is appreciated!





	Michael in the Bathroom With Someone Else

* * *

Knock, knock, knock, knock.  
_Oh god._  
Michael scooted down further, tangling his hands in his hair.  
_They’re gonna start to shout soon._  
Knock, knock, knock, knock.  
“I-I’ll be out soon!” He hated how his voice cracked.  
The doorknob jiggles.  
“Hey, are you okay? You sound like you’re having a–“  
“I’m fine!”

_Oh great, they probably think I’m an asshole. They probably hate me. God, I’m such a loser._

_“_ Can you please let me in?” The voice asks. It’s soft, and not inherently female, but it was higher pitched than most males.  
Michael shakily tried to stand up, and his legs nearly gave out. “Um, yeah, just- give me a second.”

Michael tried to stand up again, bracing himself against the sink for support. He took a shaky step towards the door and unlocked it. The doorknob slowly twisted, and the door opened.

In the doorway stood a boy. He looked to be about his age, maybe a bit younger. He was dressed up as Link.  
Michael was confused until he remembered: Right, this was a Halloween party.

There was an awkward silence before the boy decided to speak.

“My name is Nathan. I um, I needed to use the bathroom– but then I heard you, and it sounded like you were having a panic attack. Are you alright? Do you want to talk about it?”  
Michael opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

And then he burst into tears.  
_Great, now he probably thinks I’m weak._  
Nathan set a hand on his shoulder and steered Michael over to the bathtub. He gently nudged Michael to sit on the side of it before sitting next to him.

Words mingling together, Michael sobbed out an explanation of what happened. Nathan listened intently, rubbing Michael’s back.

“And– And–“ He started hyperventilating. Nathan finally interrupted.  
“Woah, hey hey hey, can you breathe for me? Breathe.” He grabbed Michael’s hand and set it against his chest. “Can you feel my heartbeat, feel my chest rise and fall with each breath I take?”  
Michael nodded, still struggling to control his breathing.  
“Breathe with me, then. Listen to my voice.” He did as Nathan instructed, and his breathing gradually slowed down.

When he had calmed down enough, Michael continued.  
“I shouldn’t be freaking out so badly about this. But, Jeremy was my only friend, and now I’m all alone. I’ve got no one. Plus, I and him were friends for thirteen years! Thirteen years! And only now has he decided that being popular is more important than me.”

Nathan nodded slowly. “Yeah, I know what that feels like. But have you considered how it might feel from Jeremy’s point of view?”

Michael scowled. “Jeremy’s point of view? Jeremy’s point of view? While he has a girlfriend and all these new people who care about him, I’ve got nothing, nada! He’s happier without me, and he’s probably not even thinking about me right now!”

“I understand,” Nathan replied patiently. “What you said is true. Jeremy is being selfish. But have you also considered how he got where he is? He was manipulated, by some computer in his brain that’s the equivalent of a tic-tac.”  
Michael listened, his brows furrowed.  
“The Squip made Jeremy hate himself- More than he already did. I don’t know Jeremy that well, I’m just basing this off of my experience with that stupid pill, but I think the reason he got the Squip in the first place was because he didn’t like himself.

He hated himself. And the way that the Squip works, is it makes you feel like you’re nothing without it. It manipulates your personality, and it controls you so much that without it, you don’t know how to function. How to act.  
“Do you get what I’m saying here? Jeremy’s Squip wasn’t there when he talked to you. He didn’t know what to say, so he just did what he thought his Squip would want him to do- be a dick.”

Michael nodded thoughtfully. “That makes sense. It just– it still hurts.” Nathan nodded and smiled sympathetically.  
“Yeah, I know. So, are you a little calmer now?”

Michael thought for a moment. His breathing had slowed down, as did his heart rate, and his thoughts were no longer racing through his head too quickly for him to grasp them.  
“Yeah.”

Nathan smiled. “In that case, I um- I still have to pee.” Michael’s eyes widened.  
“Oh! Right! Sorry, yeah, I’ll just–“ He stood up and opened the door. He paused though after smelling something, confusion written on his face.

“Wait a minute. Is that… Smoke…?”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Again, any feedback/comments are appreciated. Thank you for reading! :)


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